Namaste, Bitches Bumper Sticker

The joke lands in one read. Namaste sets up the serenity; bitches knocks it over. Nobody needs it explained, and nobody forgets it.

Blue print on white. High contrast, so the two words read from a car length, which is the whole job of a bumper sticker.

Sold with a wink, and a little respect. Namaste is a living greeting for hundreds of millions of people. This sticker is teasing the yoga-class version of it, not the people who say it at home.

• Slogan: Namaste, Bitches
• Print: blue type on white
• Border: flowing decorative border around the print
• Quantity: one bumper sticker
• Maker: AzureGreen
• Weight: about 0.3 oz
• Size: contact Plentiful Earth for exact measurements

Namaste is a Sanskrit greeting meaning, roughly, I bow to you, and it is spoken every day across India and Nepal, usually with palms pressed together. Western yoga studios adopted it to close class and gave it the expanded gloss the light in me honors the light in you. The sticker's joke is aimed squarely at that studio version, the serene voice that can turn out to be as impatient as anyone.

In the witch and pagan community the sticker is used as humor with a purpose. Witches have always known that laughter is a form of power, a way of refusing to be intimidated, and the slogan packs that refusal into two words. It says you can honor the light in a person and still tell them to back up off your bumper. Many practitioners treat that pairing, kindness plus a boundary, as a fair summary of what a healthy practice looks like. Keep the respect in mind: the greeting belongs to living traditions, and the joke works best when it is aimed at ourselves.

1. Wash the spot first. A little dish soap and water, or a wipe of rubbing alcohol, takes off the road film and wax that keep stickers from gripping. Let it dry completely.
2. Apply when the surface is somewhere near room temperature. Cold metal and blazing-hot metal both make the adhesive fussy, so a shady afternoon or a garage is ideal.
3. Peel back one end of the backing, line the sticker up, and press it down from the center outward with the flat of your hand or a credit card. That pushes the air out as you go instead of trapping it.
4. Say it out loud once as you press it on, with the exact tone you intend. That is the closest thing this sticker has to a consecration. Then rub the edges and give the adhesive a day before the next car wash.
5. When it is time to take it down, warm it with a hairdryer, lift a corner, and peel slowly at a low angle. A dab of cooking oil or citrus adhesive remover clears any leftover residue.

Think about who sees your car regularly before you commit. Or do not think about it at all, which is also a valid practice.

• Om Bumper Sticker, 3 x 3 Inches: the sincere version of the same syllable, for a bumper with range.
• Never Piss Off A Witch Bumper Sticker: the same energy from the witch side, so the two can share a bumper.
• I Can Only Please One Person Per Day Bumper Sticker: for the days the sticker's mood is your mood.
• What Would Buddha Do bumper sticker: the question this sticker cheerfully declines to ask.
• My Other Car Is A Broom bumper sticker: keeps the humor going and tells everyone exactly whose car it is.

What does namaste actually mean?

Namaste is a Sanskrit greeting that translates roughly as I bow to you, spoken daily across India and Nepal with palms pressed together. Western yoga studios adopted it to close class and added the expanded meaning the light in me honors the light in you. The sticker is joking about that studio version.

Is Namaste, Bitches disrespectful to Hindus or yoga practitioners?

The joke is aimed at the Western yoga-studio use of the word, not at the people for whom namaste is an everyday greeting. We sell it with that understanding and say so on the page. If you would rather honor the word straight, the Om sticker or the Ahimsa sticker carries the same roots without the punchline.

Why is this one of your witchy bumper stickers?

Because witches have always used humor as a form of power. The slogan pairs kindness with a boundary in two words, which is a fair summary of how most of us try to move through the world. AzureGreen makes it as part of the same pagan sticker line as the rest of our bumper collection.

How big is the sticker and what color is it?

The print is blue type on a white background. The listing does not carry exact measurements, so please message Plentiful Earth before ordering if you are fitting it to a particular spot. It is sized like the rest of AzureGreen's bumper line, to be read from the car behind you.

How do I apply it so it lasts, and can I remove it later?

Clean the spot with soapy water or rubbing alcohol, let it dry, and apply at a mild temperature by pressing from the center outward. Wait a day before washing the car. To remove it, warm it with a hairdryer, peel slowly at a low angle, and clear residue with cooking oil or citrus remover.